


He cleans up the shards

by albert_al, oops (albert_al)



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-21
Updated: 2019-08-21
Packaged: 2020-09-23 05:03:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20334523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/albert_al/pseuds/albert_al, https://archiveofourown.org/users/albert_al/pseuds/oops
Summary: Ivan doesn't want him to know.





	He cleans up the shards

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING:  
this fic is kind of heavy with murder, whats basically child abuse, and toxic relationships.

_"Uncle Ivan" Alin asks hesitantly, pointing towards a photograph._  
_"Who is that?" he points to a boy, a boy with curly hair violet eyes and a sad smile. _

_Alin stares up at him his eyes are wide and curious. Alin doesn't know, no one but Ivan does. He points to the nervous boy in the photo like it's nothing, nothing. Because for Alin, it is nothing. _  
_"It is nothing" Ivan insists, "Don't worry about it". Ivan doesn't want him to know, Ivan doesn't want it to mean anything more to Alin than nothing. Ivan wants it behind him, he wants to forget._  
_"Okay" Alin says, unconvinced, eyeing the boy. He's trying to figure it out. By looking at him, he's curious, he wants to know who the boy is. _  
_No one must know, not Alin, not Toris, no one._  
_Ivan looks away, he doesn't want to think about it. He wants it to be nothing._

Raivis is still young. He giggles as Ivan hoists him off of the ground and into his arms.

He's small, he hasn't seen the world, his eyes are wide and he sees the world and everything as new, he's only three years old. Ivan chuckles, tells him how big he's grown. Just by looking at him, Ivan wants to give Raivis the childhood he never had.

Toris watches him with a careful eye, and smiles.

In the early days, Toris goes to work. While Toris is away, Ivan watches Raivis he keeps him company.

Ivan doesn't mind, he likes watching Raivis. He knows how much Toris worries, he doesn't want Toris to worry. He knows how much he worries about Raivis. Ivan has online school, so he's always there. Toris depends on him. In the evenings Toris comes home, they eat dinner.

Mostly, they play around. Playing little games, Ivan tells him stories, keeps him occupied.

Sometimes, Ivan shows him the egg. The little glass egg he keeps there.

The one his mother gave to him, the one he keeps to remember her by. Raivis loves to look at the little egg, the little intricate designs and details.  
"Look Raivis, it's the egg" Ivan says, and holds him up so he can see.  
Raivis giggles, that's how Ivan can tell he's happy.

One day Ivan and Raivis are playing around, Raivis is getting excited. He's running back and forth, he's laughing hard and Ivan is laughing too like he almost always laughs.  
Raivis takes a sharp turn, he crashes into the small wooden table.  
There isn't enough time to catch the glass egg, before it falls to the ground and shatters into a million pieces.

Ivan's stunned at first then he turns stern.  
"Raivis" he says. He stares at the glass shards mournfully, Raivis is crying. Ivan feels like crying too.

But he doesn't cry, he shoves him out of the way. Picking up the bigger sharps with his hands, trying not to loose his temper.  
"Stop whining" the words come out sharp, and harsher than he means them too. He cleans up the shards.

Raivis keeps crying.

_**"Quiet!" **_  
He's growing more and more irritated, his voice is growing louder.

Raivis cries quieter.

Time flies, Raivis is older now, 10 years old. Ivan doesn't pick him up anymore. He flinches at his touch, Ivan can't watch him anymore.

Raivis goes to school. In the evenings he comes home with Toris, but he doesn't talk. He's fairly quiet, Toris wonders what is wrong.  
Ivan sets a hand on his shoulder, he's worried about him.  
"Raivis" he says in a low tone. "Is something wrong?". He's worried about him too, he wants to know why he's jumpy.  
"I'm fine"  
Raivis replies, shrinking away. Ivan wonders why he seems to avoid him why he doesn't laugh or smile like he used to.  
"Raivis" Ivan adds in a firmer tone, "are you lying".  
Raivis takes a step back, "I'm fine" he says quickly and without another word he goes to his room and closes the door. He was in a hurry, Ivan wonders why.  
Was it something he did? Was it something he said? Ivan turns away, soon his confusion turns to anger.

Raivis is being too cold to him.

Toris argues with him a lot now, he's stressed and that makes Ivan stressed.

Sometimes they spend their evenings just screaming at each other.

Saying things they don't mean, and making threats they don't intend to carry through.

They always feel sorry afterward. Try to make it up with each other, Raivis doesn't come out of his room. The walls are thin, Ivan imagines he can hear it but he never asks. So he never knows. Nothing is the same as when it once was, they aren't as young and happy as they once were then.

Ivan wonders why.

One day Toris and Ivan are screaming to each other again.  
They are louder than usual, the argument more heated. And more is on the line, Raivis hasn't been doing well in school.

His teachers called Toris while he was at work.

Toris is stressed and worried about him, he takes it out on Ivan. Ivan takes it out on him back.  
Suddenly Toris is yelling, yelling, Ivan can't take it anymore. Toris gets too close. Ivan doesn't think about it, he pushes him backward.  
He pushes him too hard, Toris falls backwards sputtering into the bookcase.  
Toris is gone before Ivan can tell him he's sorry.  
Ivan rushes of the room, following Toris, trying to console him, tell him he's sorry but Toris isn't having any of it. He leaves, he doesn't explain, he doesn't need to.

Ivan watches him leave, he turns around.

He sees Raivis peering at him with those eyes, those eyes that remind him of Toris and for once that doesn't make him cherish them. That makes him extremely, bitterly angry.

_ **"GO TO YOUR ROOM"** _

Raivis scatters. Ivan is alone.

It is time for Raivis to go, he's going away with Toris. Toris hates him now, so Ivan probably won't see him ever again.

They are sitting in Ivan's office upstairs.

They have sat in silence for the past few minutes, until Raivis gets up. He seems to stifin as he eyes Ivan with fear. He's scared, he's always scared.

Why is he so scared?

"I-I'm going now" he says.Then makes his way to the door, and pauses at the stairs.  
He says nothing, he just pauses.  
Ivan stands up quietly, so that Raivis doesn't hear. So that he doesn't flinch or back away. Ivan knows he's going to leave, possibly forever.

He doesn't want that, he wants Raivis to stay.  
He puts a hand on Raivis's shoulder, he's about to say something when Raivis recoils. "Don't-".  
Ivan doesn't think about it, he gives him a slight push.

That's all it takes, just a slight push. He doesn't mean to push him so far, just a little bit.

But a slight push is all it takes, to send him tumbling down.

Off he goes, down, down, down, he's screaming, he's crying.

Ivan just watches him as he falls. There's a thud. He lands at the bottom. Everything goes quiet.

_Alin looks at Ivan, with those deep brown eyes. Ivan knows he doesn't believe him, but he knows he can never tell him. He can never tell anyone. It has to be nothing. _


End file.
